I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
