Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
