Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
