I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
We are all done wearing pants today
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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