I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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