Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Randomize
