I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Panties = found
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
