I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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