Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Farmville is her only friend.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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