Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
