:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
