called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I just want to make out with him forever
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Randomize
