You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
