it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
