He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
