i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
