:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Randomize
