At least make sure they are 18
Why
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
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