just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
