We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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