ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize