To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
