My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize