why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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