Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
