just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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