And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
