It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
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