I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize