i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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