Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
