who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
