i would punch a child for taco bell
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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