i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
