Please, let me fuck your mom
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
