Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
