Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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