More tranny stories later!
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
