You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
