come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
