I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
These tits shall not be calmed
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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