Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I just found puke in my bra..
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
