therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
