He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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