so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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