Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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