he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
