What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
