Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Say something about gay babies.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Randomize
