At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
