Swine flu. Run for my life!
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize